In the meantime..Take care

A woman in Florida has sued her employers for developing carpal tunnel syndrome – also known as repetitive motion injury – in both hands. Why should this make news? It’s a common occupational hazard for data entry operators and others who spend all day typing on a keyboard. Right, except the lady in question is no data entry operator and she didn’t get her tendons in a twist from too much typing. She got it from too much masturbating.

The woman, who lives in Fort Lauderdale, is a phone sexline operator. Her job description requires her to masturbate regularly – up to seven times a day - while indulging her clients’ sexual fantasies. The ambidextrous female used one hand to answer the phone and the other to give herself an orgasm during the verbal foreplay. It’s all about customer satisfaction. Isn’t that what they teach you at management school?

The phone sex lady has filed for worker’s compensation from Florida’s Department of Labor and Employment Security. She has claimed weekly benefits of $267 and also asked to be reimbursed $30,000 for medical bills reimbursement, after a neurosurgeon operated on her hand to relieve the pain. Hey lady! You forgot to collect damages for mental trauma.

Now that’s what I call private enterprise at its finest. It’s no wonder that the USA is the leader of the free world.

Let me explain, I was recently a bridesmaid in a wedding and decided to participate in the long-held tradition of pre-wedding pampering with the rest of the bridal party. I envisioned sparkly feet and loads of relaxation. However, I ended up with a large wound on the side of my foot where my pedicurist was over-zealous with the pumice stone and scraped away perfectly good skin. In fact, skin that I needed, since the following day I was to wear cute bridesmaid shoes with straps that crossed over the offending wound. So, there I was going to the drug store at the last minute to get band-aids that were sheer so that no one would see the band-aid peeking out from my strap and ruin the aforementioned “sparkly feet” vision I still had hope for in the wedding pictures.

Of course, not wanting to raise a stink and ruin the pampering day for the bride, I not only paid full price, but tipped as well! I tipped someone for rubbing my skin off and giving me a wound!?! What’s wrong with me? As a woman, have I grown accustomed to pain for the price of beauty? Or, as I suspect, do weddings make people do things they wouldn’t normally do?? Hmmm…does anyone out there have any theories?

First of all, what classifies her as a celebrity? What is her talent? Is she an award winning actress? Is she a great super model? Has she helped the needy children of the world? No, she has not. What is her career field? Socialite? Is that a career? Can you claim that on your taxes? I don’t remember Socialite being offered as a college major. Oh, I am sorry, she is a hotel heiress to the Hilton Hotel empire. Well I guess that classifies you as someone of great notoriety and intelligence that everyone turns to for inspiration on how they themselves can help better this world. Give me a break.

I am sure there is more important news to cover. I don’t care what outfit she had on when she had to appear in court. Does anyone care that I have on a cotton t-shirt and shorts? I sure hope not. This seems like a sad media obsession. Oh wait, I guess I am contributing to this obsession as well.

Now lets create some content!

What do I mean by failed deliveries?

Imagine ordering a package on Amazon in March, inputting the correct mailing address, and finding out through Amazon’s Track Packages system, that your long awaited shipment has been statused as a “Insufficient Address, Return to Sender”. No attempt to redeliver the package a second time. It is going right back to Amazon.

Of course I voiced my opinion to Amazon’s Customer Service Representatives. They explained to me that according to their company policy, returned shipments are not resent out, and they will have to refund my purchase. This policy alone was hard for me to accept, but I had no choice according to Amazon, and had to RE-ORDER the items if I wanted to receive them again. Re-order items that I did not want to return in the first place?? The representative was so kind as to give me credit towards the cost of shipping for my second item, which I gladly accepted as well as their kind apologies for their mistake.

I went ahead and placed another order for the same items in April, and patiently waited for my shipment to arrive in the scheduled 3 business days. On the expected delivery day, I logged onto Amazon and clicked Track Packages for my shipment. Guess what? To my surprise, the item was once again statused as “Insufficient Address, Return to Sender”. Same address, same carrier. Thinking this might have been a problem with the shipping company, I contacted them. They explained to me over the phone, that the only reason that the shipment would be placed in this status, is that the shipper (Amazon) incorrectly labeled the item. Once again, I contacted Amazon Customer Service, and explained to them what the shipper told me and asked them to look into how they are labelling their items for shipment from their Delaware warehouse, which they stated that is where the items were coming from. Once again, Amazon acted like they were sorry for their mistake, gave me another coupon so I can upgrade to next day shipping when I placed my order on my second refunded purchase.

The package arrived on the third attempt, but it took a different delivery address, and a different shipping company to have it arrive. Something is seriously going on with Amazon. I have never before had a issue with their service before, and have even received shipments before to the same address with no problems at all. Amazon, please fix your company before it is too late.